Return and Reunion Workshop

SO!! Last Saturday was like, an awesome day, hands down for a thousand different reasons. Partly because it started off with Dunkin Donuts, also probably because I picked up a pretty special white dress for a pretty special occasion coming up :) BUT, for the most part it was because the Family Readiness Officer for Red Bank's deployment put on a Return and Reunion Workshop for all the spouses and some parents of our deployed Marines.... which means, WE ARE ON THE HOME STRETCH. (Well, Lord willing, still nothing's definite.) BUT, the workshop was extremely encouraging and helpful for me & Jess. I learned SO much about how to make his return smoother and less stressful for him, and the different resources we have available to us in our newly Veteran status (resources concerning making his adjustment to civilian life easier and smoother). I would absolutely LOVE to share with you all about how YOU can help us make this transition time easier for Zack and to be honest, being sensitive to him and his needs. He doesn't know I'm writing this, and would probably be like, "BABE. I'm not sensitive!!!!" And while I know that my dear, I want this to be an easy, stressless, smooth experience for you, because honestly it's probably going to be harder than we think.

So, I will start from the beginning. Filling our bellies with delicious French Vanilla coffee with skim milk and 4 splenda (just the way Jess likes it ;) ), we set off for our road trip to Middletown, NJ (??) Who knew this place even existed. Not I, that's for sure. We arrived (smoothly for the most part, but of course we encountered a few obstacles that me and Jess USUALLY encounter whenever driving anywhere, consisting of wrong turns, not knowing directions, passing streets, you know, the usual). There were a good number of people there, so we sat down at a table and the day started off with our FRO (Family Readiness Officer) showing us a power point of different issues.

AND. Here's what I learned.

TIPS FOR FAMILY AND FRIENDS

- Try to keep an open mind about how the reunion should go.

- Don't schedule too many activities for our Marine. He may be too tired or not want to do everything right at once.

- Keep in mind that our Marine may need time to adjust to his surroundings and civilian life again.

- Their style of communication for the last 8 months has been verbal orders, so chances are he's not going to react well to "direct orders" from family and friends.

- Don't ask questions!!!! Our FRO was very clear about this. Please, please remember this:: Questions are the last things they want to hear. If you are finding a hard time thinking of stuff to say to them, tell them about some memories or some things that made you think of them while they were gone, but DON'T barrage them with questions. When they are ready to talk about their experiences, they will.



There are specifically 7 Stages that the Marine & Spouse go through::

Stage 1 - Anticipation of Departure

Stage 2 - Detachment and Withdrawal

Stage 3 - Emotional Disorganization

Stage 4 - Recovery and Stabilization

Stage 5 - Anticipation of Returning

Stage 6 - Return Adjustment and Renegotiation

Stage 7 - Reintegration and Stabilization



These stages are pretty self explanatory. And when I get the rest of my notes I will be sure to blog again about this topic, but I guess the thing to keep in mind is that this return is not about you or me or how happy we are, or how much time we get to be with him, or what to bake him when he gets home. It's about our Marine, and making it as less stressful and smooth as possible. So keep an open line of communication, and be sensitive to his attitudes, and desires. I love him to death, and I know you do too, so the best way to be considerate of him is to just ask. Thanks for taking the time to read!! Semper Fi and I am SOOOO EXCIIIIIITEEEEEEEEEEEEDDDDDDDDD!!!!!

Jess & I got to meet 2 other girls who's men are over there with Zack and Brian. They are all friends actually, and just like Zack and Brian are roommates, Erin and Amanda's men are roommates too :) Kinda cute.



AND for some fun non-related photos in any way :)